Rebuilding (A HaiKu)

A new beginning,

I’ve missed writing and sharing.

Fresh insight is due.

The last few weeks have been challenging. I have struggled with my choices. I wanted to free up some time, but the activities that took up my time are all worthy pursuits. Once before I stopped my nursing license, then renewed it for the pandemic. I had a much easier decision when I gave up my anesthesia credentials as a CRNA. I knew that at my age, even 12 years ago, I had no business staying in the operating room as an anesthetist. Although COVID-19 is not over, it is much more manageable now. So I stepped back from a volunteer clinic and I am doing less vaccinations now…

What should I concentrate on now? No one knows their expiration date, but getting older has definitely brought it to my mind more often. I am soon to be a great-grandmother and I find that so exciting. I question if I’ve made any positive impressions on my family that will be remembered. I also want to be remembered as someone who enjoyed her life and had fun, faith, and valued family.

“Almost everything will work again if you unplug it for a few minutes, including you.–Anne Lamott, writer.

That is my nugget of inspiration for today.

Let’s keep in touch.

Looking Back to Go Forward

I’ve been thinking about the new year coming up, which led to thinking about the past. There are many famous and not-so-famous remarks about history. People say you can’t hold on to the past, and you should forget it and move on. Like my family once commented about Kansas–it’s best seen in the rearview mirror. However, the past helped to make me who I am now.

“The past is a stepping stone, not a millstone.”

Robert Plant

The joyful moments, the frightening occurrences, and the sad times contained lessons that I’ve drawn on years later. What you do with those lessons makes all the difference in handling the present.

Most cars today are equipped with backup cameras. You view your area and check the backup camera for any obstacles, and seeing none–you act and move the car out of the garage or a parking space and proceed. So it is with the year behind us, indeed the past two years, we lived through them, learned a lot, and hopefully, we are entering a new time of hope and healthy recovery.

I pray it may be so. #love,#comments#conversation#faith

You’ve Done It Before

“What doesn’t kill you makes a fighter,

footsteps even lighter…”

Song by Kelly Clarkson

You’ve done it before, recovered from a blow, when you thought it the very worst.

Yet here you are plodding along, your life isn’t really cursed.

Remember the embarrassment in middle school and having to tell your folks? You thought they’ likely disown you, but there are your own kids,

Who laugh at papa’s jokes.

Until you’ve had a death that happens to someone close that you know,You don’t know what to say or do to try and help them through.

But as life throws you curve balls and fouls, you learn to adjust your stance,

A Rainstorm is approaching

You pick up the bat and face the pitch, willing to take the chance.

Been through a lot, the key word is through, and this storm will pass you will see.

Do what you can to help, pray and let go, and let God–the one who sets us free.

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New Year’s Focus

“Happy New Year!” I’ve heard it from many friends and family members, but almost all add,”Hope next year’s better, good riddance to 2020,” or a similar sentiment. No doubt that it has been a difficult year and for many–a terrible year of sickness and loss. I began to think about what I would like to reach for in 2021. I came up with a few words that fit the things I most want to live toward in this new year.

N-E-W Y-E-A-R

N – Non judgmental attitude. Everyone has something that they’re hiding, working on, grieving, or may be simply blind to.

E – Eager – I want to wake up eager to face the day, see new things or at least see in a new way.

W – I’ll try to write every day, if only to help myself figure out what I believe and where I stand on the issues of today.

Y – Yesterday is gone. Don’t keep mulling it over. MOVE ON.

E – Enough – I have enough and I am enough.

A – Active – It’s important to stay active. Word could be ambulate, amble, accelerate…

R – Respond -React and respond when I feel that urges to call someone, or write a note, etc. My time or that person’s may be shorter than we know.

These are a few of my “words.” Think of a word or words that sum up your wishes for the new year. I would love to hear what you come up with.

Photo by Oleg Zaicev on Pexels.com

Join me next time for Connie’s comments and verse.

Tangled, Broken, and Retied

As I examined at knitted scarf I’ve been making this week, I tucked in a couple of stray pieces of yarn. I had run out of yarn in one skein and had begun to work from a new one at one place. I could see where I attached the new yarn and wove in the loose end–sort of. A small piece of yarn had still poked up and stood out. I found another error where I had added one stitch more than I should to a section.

Everyone is praying for 2021 to be a healthier, less divisive and more peaceful year. May it be so and may we greet others with an attitude of love and understanding.

On the surface the piece looks acceptable, but I know where the yarn was fraying a little bit and where I tore a row out to redo it.

I am much like a piece of my knitting–acceptable on the surface, but only God and I know where I was broken and knit back together through my life and what each “I’m sorry” cost me to face up to my mistakes and own them. I ask God to point out my mistakes also as we all can be blind to our faults and omissions.

Each event in our lives adds to the fabric of the outward appearance we present. What would people see if they saw the underside where the mistakes and the patches of hurt placed over them have left scars? They would see the smooth sections interspersed with the uglier knotted and tied-together repairs.

As we go forward from this unbelievable year; we grieve with the people who have lost jobs as well as loved ones and we’ve disagreed with others whose political and even medical views differ from ours. But it is important to remember that each person we meet has a few knots and patches, some repaired and some still dangling. Love and understanding go a long way toward revealing the outward person as the true self and not a disguise of what lies beneath.

Friendship is born at that moment when one person says to another, “What! You too? I thought I was the only one.”

C. S. Lewis

Childhood Christmases

“Christmas waves a magic wand over this world, and behold, everything is softer and more beautiful.”

Norman Vincent Peale

A neighbor shared some oranges with me today and that was all it took to send my mind back over seventy years to my childhood. My bus driver would give each of us an orange and a candy cane as he delivered us home for Christmas break. In my rural neighborhood, there was a man who became Santa and went house to house where there were kids. He had prearranged the visit with the parents so we received one gift that was something we had asked for. It worked well for small ones, but when Santa pulled my present out of the bag, I recognized the wrapping paper from the chest upstairs and the “jig was up.”

Of course, if I hadn’t been snooping around, my innocence might have been preserved a little longer.

When I read down the list of the so-called traditions of Christmas, I have experienced many of them. I have gone caroling and we always put on a Christmas play at church. We always had a real tree and if I close my eyes I can almost conjure the scent of pine. One of my memories of pine is a little different.

We had two very large pines behind our house on the edge of a field where we usually planted the garden. One day we came home from town after dark and as the headlights swung over our property my dad let out a yell. “What the Hell?” Someone had cut the entire top out of one of our pines. It was quite a feat considering the height of the tree!

Even though 2020 has been a tough year for everyone, I still sense a little excitement in the air as Christmas approaches. Masked people dart through the stores, being careful, but with a purpose in their steps. Secret bags of cookies or cards are being shared by thoughtful neighbors. When the big snow hit a couple days ago, many were out early to shovel and help clean the windshields for others. A kind gentleman shoveled paths through the snow in my neighborhood, so that the owners of small dogs could find a place for the pets to “go.”

When a Savior came to bring love and peace, He brought it for all. He is still showing the way even in 2020 if we have eyes to see, ears to hear and hearts of love. Peace, love, and joy to all!

If I could give you just one thing,
I'd give you joy that would make your heart sing.
A joy and a peace that was brought to strangers,
When a young mother laid a babe in a manger.
ccousins